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.Thursday, August 13, 2009 @ 11:20 PM Y

Currently tuning into:Britney Spears - Born To Make You Happy

I'm sitting here alone up in my room,
And thinking about the times that we've been through,
I'm looking at a picture in my hand phone,
Trying my best to understand,
I really want to know what we did wrong,
With a love that felt so strong,
If only you were here tonight,
I know that we could make it right.

I'd do anything, I'd give you my world,
I'd wait forever, to be your girl,
Just call out my name, and I will be there,
Just to show you how much I care.

Today went TRIPLE DATING at Summit. Haha cheh xde la. :P

Saleh's b'day today. Went to Sunway after my Comp Studies class to meet Bell. Then lpak2, jln2 fer a while, then went to Summit, where the real celebrations were. Saleh brought two friends with him, Haikal & Amirul. All six of us went karaoke, then after 3 long hours of singing (wtf), me, Bell, Amirul, & Haikal went outside to smoke. After that went to KFC to have dinner, & to eat Saleh's b'day cake.

Before leaving from uni.

Ciggie break. Damn long nvr lpak with Bell wey.

Before leaving to Summit.

Upon arrival HAHA. Bitches in the making. Hoho.

While singing asked Bell if can smoke there or not. Unfortunately fer me, the minute I asked that I saw this sign on the wall, & started laughing like mad, while Bell was like, "Wey, ko reti bace x?" Ahaha wtf.

Wat2 pndi main la eh. Pdhal bola pun xde HAHA.

Got some videos! Weee. Well, if you can actually see what's going on la. Wtf. In my phone it was quite bright, but fer some reason when I uploaded it in Youtube become damn dark. Pfft.

p.s, jgn hiraukan suare2 sumbang. Sekian terima kasih. HAHA.

The Reason, sang by Bell & I. Don't bother figuring out which one is my voice, we mades ourselves sound as sumbang as can be. Haha.

Idk what song is this, the boys sang it, & we girls started dancing like mad. Bukak club dangdut sendiri kot HAHA. This is how the 3 of us are when together, ever since before. Presenting the crazy side of Farah, if you can actually see what's going on in the video. Pfft.

Just dance, again by Bell & I. Haha. From dangdut to modern clubbing. Haha. Taken by uh, Amirul kot. Again, take note of the three of us put together. Haha. Sound got some prob btw.

Haa, here's the grand finale. Haha. Our last song, Melompat Lebih Tinggi, where we all mmg kaw2 naik gle. We all practically look high. Kalahkan gi clubbing la kot haha. Mic? Held by Farah & Haikal HAHA. Then another round of 'Happy B'day' for Saleh.

Nad. Nmpk la sgt kan. Pfft.



B'day boy. Haha. Saleh.


After karaoke.

Makan time!

I decided to join Nad & Bell at the very last minute, cuz I wasn't really in the mood to lepak. Glad I did though, had a really good time, laughing, dancing, singing & stuff. & making two new friends. Really had a lot of fun. At some point suddenly ended up singing duet for Nidji's Biarlah with Amirul. Wtf. Then there was this part where Bell & I got emo, & Amirul & Haikal started putting our names into the lyrics they were singing. Lol.

Among the three of us, Nad's the happiest really. After months of being together unofficially with Saleh, they finally became an official couple. & to think that last time Amin & I kept on emphasizing on the fact that it was ridiculous fer them to not officially be a couple. & now looked at what happened, both of us, the so-called happy couple's the one who didn't last.

Bell also just broke up with her boyf a week ago, & she wasn't doing well. Coincidently we had the same anniversary, on the 20th, though mine lasted for 8 months while hers was 2. She was practically down the whole day. Love, drives a person crazy. Well, one thing's fer sure. At least I don't have my arm bandaged due to having carved Amin's name on my arm; I would never have the guts to go that far.

Meanwhile, Phat & I? Done, fer the moment I suppose. He's started to realise that perhaps I just don't love him as much as he loves me. First he said he didn't want to 'kaco' my relationship with Amin, if there even is one. Then suddenly he asked how I was with 'my ex' & I gave him a brief explanation. Told him that I loved Amin to death, but we barely contacted each other anymore, & that I doubt if he evens loves me any longer.Then he goes on about me being stupid, asking me how long I wanted to be played like that, no matter how much I loved him, & that he was basically giving me a chance to start a new relationship.

Thanks very much Phat. I am stupid, to still love an idiot who has done so much to hurt me. I am stupid, to still love an idiot who had another girlf behind my back when he was my boyf, not to forget the other countless girls he had. I am stupid, to still love an idiot who loves me very much, as quoted by him, "until his last breath", then claims he doesn't love me much any more, & suddenly loves me again. I am stupid, to still love an idiot who made it very obvious that he was merely using me for his own good, in certain situations. Bottom line, I am stupid, to even waste all my love on an idiot like him, who did nothing but toy around with my feelings, & eventually dumping me in the end, ske ati je nak cari aku kan, when I wait every single fucking second fer him.

I admit, I'm sick of him, not to mention very, very pissed. How can he even have the cheek to say that he still loves me, when just before that he can boldly come up to me & tell me that he doesn't love me any longer. Words that leave a permanent scar right over my heart. I'm a human with feelings, not a lifeless doll. A million apologies won't make up fer every single word he said. Despite deleting that msg, the words are deeply etched in my memory. But I love him very much, nothing is even going to change that fact, not anyone, not even Phat.

Gonna stop here. Every single thought of him, makes my heart bleed, makes me feel like crying. I feel the pain through my chest. But I won't cry, I won't bring myself down, b'cuz I know I'm strong, & I can somehow get through this. Patience, it would somehow always help.


.Farah Alia.
Growing up, lost in her ups & downs, desperately trying to find the real meaning of life. With only 18 yrs of experience in life, its a journey. With memories that can nvr be forgotten.


Family. <33
The best family ever. To mummy & papa; Bringing me into this world, raising me up & protecting me, you're the only ones that I know who would never abandon me. You taught me the importance of loving a family, to take care of others, to value life & live as a good person. Even if once I didn't understand why & thought tht you were a nuisance to me, as I grow older I started to know why, & try my best to appreciate it. Of course, growing up, as Mummy puts it, I nvr know how high the sky is or how deep the ground is, in other words, I don't know my limits, but one thing's fer sure, I'll nvr forget how important family really is. Words of wisdom, I live to the fullest each day. I love you all.

Friends. <33
All sorts. Close, best, good, or just friends. All around, to laugh with, to share with, to be together with. Besties like Nad, supportive when they can be, there to cheer you up when you're down, we need people like that in our lives. I'm grateful to have friends like y'all, to share the fun I experience with. To just talk, or chill, or hangout. A part of your life that is always a must fer everyone. I love y'all. (:


Mell Joy Hilman
Liyana Sharia


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