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.Wednesday, December 31, 2008 @ 6:42 AM Y

& here it is. The last post fer 2008. I've been through a whole lot this year, all sorts of drama, all sorts of happiness, sadness, well, bottom line, everything. & here it is, events of 2008. Brace urselves fer a uber long post.

School & Studies

2008: The last year of school life. This year was the most important year of school life, the Spm year, aka Sijil Permainan Malaysia. Woots! Haha. Teachers were starting to push students more, more projects were to be done & completed, but basically all the Form 5s couldn't be bothered; most of us were still playful right until the last few months before Spm. Fortunately for us n'way, the Spm exams that started on the 11th November were actually quite simple, compared to the normal exams.

Top: Doing add maths.
Bottom: Last day of Spm, Est papers.

This year there were quite a number of events, the memorable ones being the Perasmian Sekolah Usj8 on 08.08.08, Majlis Penyerahan Tugas AJK Pengawas 07/08, Prefect's dinner & Graduation Day, which was held for the first time in school history. Us Form 5s did our best to spend the last year of school together, with much fun as possible. There may be many things that I don't seem to remember about school atm (wtf), but overall it was a really great year.

Perasmian Smk Usj 8, 08.08.08.

Prefect's Dinner 08, Summit Hotel.

Smk U8's Graduation Day 08.


Hmm. Friends. Yes, I have lost & gained friends throughout the yr. Well, as usual, starting with the besties. Earlier this year was really good friends with my usual galfrens, Nad & Bell. But due to certain events that happened in September, I am no longer friends with Bell. Many who see me around in school would have suspected that, seeing as I was rarely with the both of them towards the last few months of school. Nevertheless, I'm over that, & managed to have the best out of everything else, so yea, basically I moved on.

All memoirs of us three together.

Of course, apart from tht I made a lot of new friends in Myspace, especially since this year I decided to join local communities such as G.I.G.S, Marous, theChoco, BFF, Kogie & theBevy. & b'cuz of myspace too, I met someone that I love very much, someone that I know I can finally be steady with.

A sign pic I made fer one of my communities, theCHOCO.

Love & Relationships - The Longest Sub-Topic!

I've had many experiences this yr, whether it being in a relationship, a simple scandal, or just plain friends with mere misunderstanding. For some reason, this year, love & friendship got jumbled up, in my case with Nad, & the ex-bestie, Bell.

I don't plan on posting out everything that happened this yr, cuz those events are merely memoirs fer me. But of course, I'll nvr forget those events, especially with guys like Jut, Ary, Yon (all three lettered names one wtf); experiences with them showed me what sort of guys were out there, & also the many weaknesses I had, which always led to me being frustrated or hurt.

However, this yr, despite being through so much, I finally found my one & only. After all the sick experiences I've been through this year, he made up fer it all, most importantly, he cured my heart & added even more joy to it. Abdul Muhaimin Osman, better known as Casper or Amin. He had been there fer me the very second we met online.

So. The story behind me & Casper. It happened just around 2 weeks after breaking up with Ary. We started chatting in Myspace, on the 5th of June, at 3am. He sent a friend request to me, though now he's denying it & is telling everyone tht I added him cuz he's cute. Lmao. N'way, I treated him as any other ms friend I had, the typical you-send-a-cmnt-&-I'll-reply-it sort of thing. Tht is, until I decided to install yahoo messenger fer IM-ing. Then it was constant chatting with him, though soon after tht I was bz with the upcoming Spm exams & at tht time my com was kinda problematic. Lol.

Eventually after a few chats he asked fer my number. Since then, it was late night calls with him. I never talked much, being the usual 'quiet' me, but I did listen to him, as eventually after a few phone calls he started opening out to me, about problems with his current relationship then. Through those talks, he proved himself to be a very honest & caring person, & then did it amaze me that there were actually guys like him out there. Of course, as I can honestly say now, tht at tht time I only liked him as a friend, nothing more, nothing less.

However, a few months later, I had this complicated thing going on with one of his friends. Complicated in a sense that this particular guy was not my boyf, yet in a way we were like a couple. Of course, I nvr knew he was Casper's friend, & neither did he know otherwise, until he saw our myspace pgs(we had each other pics on our pg). As my feelings fer his friend became stronger, & I was starting to get clingy, he brought me back to reality when I found out that this guy I loved so much was nothing more than a fxcktard. Course, I was hurt, but if it hadn't been fer Casper, the hurt would have been much more overwhelming. This particular event is a confusing one to story about, & I don't plan on going through every detail now, cuz basically Idfc about it anymore. N'way, after this event I rarely kept in touch with Casper, as he was bz with his own probs, & I was bz with trials.

19.10.08. I rmbr tht day & the nx one very clearly. On tht afternoon I was watching Sex & The City with my family, while eating Cadbury's Rum & Raisin & texting Casper, until I finally ran out of credit. Oddly, throughout tht week, I had been thinking a lot about him, wondering how he was, & actually missing him. WTF. N'way, tht night, at 8.20pm(2020), he texted me, saying tht he was otw back to Unisel, & hoped tht I prayed fer his safety, cuz tht night he wanted to call. & he added tht he missed me, & loved me. At tht moment, in my head I was like, "Err, okay. So recently I've been thinking about him & now this guy that nvr showed any signs of liking me's saying ily to me," Lol. Basically, it was true. Since we became friends, he had nvr flirted with me, let alone show signs that he had feelings fer me. Course, he was perhaps the only guy I knew to be like tht, but it nvr bothered me.

20.10.08. 12 sumthing am, he called as promised. It was just the normal conversation we usually had, tht is, until I started talking about one of my ex boyfs tht wanted me back after my Spm & another dude tht liked me alot but I only liked as a friend. Gah, of all topics, Frh. Haha. N'way, after tht he passed his phone to his friend, Mawi, which I became friends with tht night. Apparently, as he told me later after tht, he went out to release his disapointment. Roflmao. So, after getting to know abit about Mawi, he suddenly started lecturing me, telling me tht Casper liked me, & tht I should accept him. Of course, I became very confused. After tht, the phone was passed to another friend, Atan, who gave the same lecture, & even added scolding to it, saying I must be somehow blind to not realise it. Wtf. Nevertheless, their words struck me like cold iced water, & I realised how obvious certain things were. Constant late night calls, an invitation to be his prom date, those were definitely not your usual only-friend-stuff.

An hr later, he came back, unaware of the conversations we had. He didn't know what I had found out, & I didn't confront him. Well, until he suddenly asked fer advise, saying tht he liked some gal a lot, but fer some reason he couldn't tell her how he felt. Haha. I remember feeling how I felt then. A mixture of wanting to laugh, feeling touched, knowing the very fact tht the girl was me. It was weird really, giving him advise on how to tell me he loved me. Swt.

I remember clearly how I felt the moment I accepted him. I felt tingles all over my body, as if this was what I had wanted from him all the while. It surprised me of course, cuz he was the last person I thought I'd ever have feelings for, let alone have him as my nx boyf. But what do you know, no regrets at all, right until this very second. Amazing how you can even hide your own feelings from yourself huh? Haha. Fer the 1st week of our relationship I didn't sleep fer 5 solid nights, despite having school & exams then. Was bz hanging on the phone with him. Yes, fer 6 solid hrs, 12am to 6am. Yet I showed no signs of being tired, as I'm sure Bhai & Wan Ying would have remembered, how hyper I was those mornings. Haha.

I remember every single moment tht I had with him. Our 1st date in Sunway on the 2nd Nov, the 1st time he held my hand, the very 1st kiss he gave on my forehead, the 1st kiss we shared, the day we introduced each other to our families, the fun times we had together, the laughter we shared, the outings we had, so much more. His kisses, his hugs, his touch, his laughs, his jokes, all those amazing things about him tht make me feel so happy, so complete, so perfect. He has nvr let me down, especially in these 2 months of our relationship, & he is perhaps the only guy tht I can trust completely, compared to all the others I've dated in the past. To me, he's way beyond perfect, & I'm more than glad to have him as mine. I love him with all my life, & so much more, & by the way it's going now, losing him is bound to be heart wrenching. jetaime, syg.

1st date, Sunway.

His hse, 21st December, one day after our 2nd month anniversery.

Syg, you wat sinopsis je, I dah tulis essay kowt. Wekk. Haha.

There. A simple post. Cuz I'm a bit the lazy to update. Swtz. Besides tht, there are lots of stuff tht I don't rmbr much, so yea.


This time last yr? I was a foolish, immature bitch who couldn't get over the fact that her ex boyf had gone without a trace, without even saying much of a goodbye or asking fer a break up. & b'cuz of tht I screwed myself up, big time. I was in a relationship, with a boyf tht was head over heels in love with me yet I was out there doing other stuff with other guys, having another boyf at the same time. But of course, eventually I realise tht I was wrong, & tried to set things back to normal, though I only managed to set a few back.

This yr, I managed to set my life straight again, dropping all the stuff that I shouldn't do, like smoking for instance(yes, I stopped!). With the strong will I had & the support, love, & care I received from my current boyf, Casper, I managed to keep on the bright side of life, being who I am at this very moment.

Early yr.

Mid yr.

All grown up huh?

Farewell 2008, Welcome 2009.

.Sunday, December 28, 2008 @ 10:53 AM Y

Woohoo! New laptop! Weeeeeee.

N'way, these past 2 days have been kinda bz fer me, but mind you, very, very enjoyable. On Friday night there was dinner at one of my aunt's hse, & yesterday I went to some kenduri kahwin with syg & one of our friends, Ramzy. Then at night was one of the highlights of this yr, my uncle's wedding (mum's cousin).

Friday night was just a simple dinner, with my aunt's vegetarian cooking & catering. Many familiar faces were there, some whose names I sorta forgotten. Many couldn't recognize me, since, well, the last time they actually met me was years back, when I was around maybe 11, 12.

Before leaving.

Yesterday, went to syg's ex classmate's wedding in Putrajaya. Yeap, ex classmate, which basically means she's 18. Imagine tht, being married at 18. It's a scary world out there man. Lmao. N'way, went with Ramzy, whom I met online, & happens to be one of syg's good friends. Otw we got lost, so while waiting fer syg's friend to bring us to the place we stopped by at some bridge wtf.

The first few pics of us tht I post on my blog. Lol.
Ouh, see the bottom pic. There's a reason I don't take pics from below.

Then at night, the wedding dinner! This was the first time in ages that I actually got to dress up with mum, & mind you, were not talking simple baju kurungs, but glamourous outfit, well, fer her n'way. Lol.

Otw to Sunway Hotel. Makeup done by mum. Here's a few of the many pics I snapped.

The food was delicious, & it was darn fun, seeing the my uncle & his friends acting like wild teenagers, & seeing uncles getting drunk. Haha.

The family. (Pic's slightly blurred.)

Aunt Lina, Adrees, & Vivian.


Mum, Aunt Lina, Aunt Linda, & Aunt Fong.

Oh, last night syg decided to pull a prank call on me, & ended up making me cry. He 'smartly' told me he wanted to break up with me b'cuz he had was going to marry another gal. After hanging up a couple of times & more unanswered calls from him, I finally answered his call & he told me that the other girl was Farah Alia bt. M. Yusshri, aka me. Gah. Wtf. All tht crying fer nothing. Oh, did I tell you, tht this is the 2nd time he's done something like tht? & yet I still love him so goddamn much. Guys. Sheesh.

.Monday, December 22, 2008 @ 1:17 PM Y

& she's prepared fer all possibilities.

So. Yesterday was a very tiring day, but above all, funnnnnn! Spent the whole day with syg, & by the end of the day I was so tired that I couldn't even stay on the phone with him at night. Lmao.

N'way, he came in the morning to pick me up, then we went to his hse in Keramat, which was quite a lovely place. After changing & getting ready we went to his neighbour's kenduri kahwin, with some of his friends. After eating, back to his hse, & out again, to Tasik Titiwangsa, which, basically had nothing. Wtf. So, while we were there his mum called & ask him to go & pick her up. Aah. Here was the highlight of the day. Meeting the boyf's mum.

All the way I was so God damn nervous, it sure beat the Spm nerves. Weird really, since I'm still meeting a person. Lmfao. N'way, after arriving home, syg decided to blackout on me by falling asleep on the couch. Sheesh. So, trying to supposingly 'impress' the mother in law I went to see if she need any help in the kitchen. Wtf. So unlike me. N'way, helped her wash the dishes, prepare tea, & then we sat down fer a chat. She asked me all the usual expected questions, like my family background, studies, how I met Amin & stuff. All the lectures & weird questions syg mentioned to me nvr came, instead this question somehow popped out:

Mum: Frh pandai mengaji?
Frh: Uh, pndi auntie, tp br2 ni sy stop jap, sbb Spm kan, xde mase. Hee.

Wtfffff. Lmao. N'way, after tht was more private time with syg. Woohoo. Lmao. Got back home at 11pm.

Pics will be up when I get my new laptop. Meanwhile, I gtg, since I'm at the gym.

.Friday, December 19, 2008 @ 10:52 PM Y

& she doesn't give a fuck about what the world has to say.

Finally, I have a new phone! Woohoo. Lmao. Sony Ericsson K660i. My very first 1st-hand phone. Wtf. Definitely brings my spirits higher.

N'way, there's not much to update really, so, uh, yea. Lol.

Oh, imagine me as a lawyer, ppl. Will I suit as one? Hmm. Yesterday mum told me to take up pre-law. Felt really sick about it, but now, on 2nd thought, maybe I will take law. & fail miserably. & let my mum realise that she shouldn't have made that decision. Hohoho. T.T

Last night syg came to my hse with his friends, Mawi & Ejad. Mum decided to do her best in humiliating me. She succeeded. Meanwhile, I felt like jumping off a cliff. Gosh, talk about having a nice mum, who's now currently doing her best in trying to destroy my future. Not allowing me to select my own preferable course, trying to find something negative about my boyf, what next. Yea, I'm grateful fer everything she's done fer me, but what's the use if in years to come I end up miserable & lonely. Sheesh. Let's just hope tht in time I'll somehow see that everything she says & does does have some good.

Someone help me, I'm bored, sick, & plain frustrated.

Oh, tmrw's my 2nd month anniversary with Casper. Though it feels more like 2years. Awesomeee. I fxcking love ya boyf. (:

& to those with non-insured mouths, watch out.

p/s: along with the new phone, I also have a new number. Thanks to those idiots who like distributing my number to others without my permission, I decided to give my new number out to only those who are close to me, & whom I can trust. If you don't have it, contact me online. Fyi, if you're not close to me, don't think of getting it, unless I like you, which is highly unlikely.


.Monday, December 15, 2008 @ 1:45 PM Y

& she prepares herself fer the great world.

So, lemme get things straight. It's been almost a month since I sat fer Spm, I haven't exactly officially celebrated the end of Spm, I can't really go out, since the boyf's so darn bz & the bestie's practically miles away in another country, I'm stuck at home doing basically nothing, gaining more weight than I already have, & to top things up I'm currently sick to the core, being 'blessed' with the flu, headaches & a terrible cough. Wow. Talk about an awesome start as a high school leaver.

Last night I sat in my room cursing to myself. Just a few months back I had planned so many things to do right after exams, but what do you know, instead I just happen to live a non-exciting life staying at home. & to make things worse, I currently have no phone to use, since mine decided to die out on me. Not that I need it really, since the ppl I regularly contact are unavailable, & the others that contact me are mostly dumb idiots, but well, yea, I can't fucking live without a phone. It never occured to me that all this will get to me, but yea, the more I think about it the more pain & frustration I actually feel. Gah.

& to top things up even more, I have a freaking future to think about. My mum's asking me to apply fer UiTM, & well, I'm currently trying my dead best to get her to put me in Unisel. But the main problem is the course that I'll be taking. All the courses that I plan on taking are the courses that she doesn't want me to take. Business, language, mass comunication, apparently those are fer the lazy ppl. So wht, I AM lazy. Instead, shes asking me to continue taking up Engineering. Me? Engineering? Definitely not a good mix. I couldn't even pass my TK in school, let alone continue in University. By the looks of it, I have 2 choices, going ahead with a course I like, despite wht others say,& be happy about it, or follow my mum & go fer something that will assure me more money. Seriously, ppl nowadays are so money minded. Wht's the freaking point of getting tons of money when you're not happy. Sheesh.

If given a chance, I would so prefer to die early, to forget about all this, but it's life ain't it? I currently feel so fucked-up, so down, so moody, definitely not what I had in mind. & this goddamn cough, gah, I'd wish it'd just go away. I was feeling better just a few days back & now it decides to come back, worse than ever. I've spent the whole day drinking cough syrup & honey, having almost passed out at the gym this morning.

Oh, & my hair's currently short. Not very short, but compared to usual, it's just plain short. Thanks to some stupid bitch who decided to let her feelings out on my hair, I currently look like an idiot.

It may look ok in the picture but trust me, I look hideous in real life.


Now I have fever.
Someone kill me. T.T

.Tuesday, December 02, 2008 @ 9:01 PM Y

& after that night, it made me realise just how much I need you.

So. I finally have plans fer now, well, that start after Raya Haji tht is, if I go back to Kota Bahru. The top one, of course, is getting my license. Only bout a while ago did Wan Ying & I talk about it. Apparently she almost hit into a tree while learning to drive her brother's car. WTF. Imagine me driving. o.O

& the next, getting a job. Went to Jusco Sunway yesterday after gym to buy pants fer my granddad, when the promoter there offered me a part-time job with her. rm5 an hr, 8hrs a day, 6 days a week, with the off day being a weekday. She only wanted Chinese, so basically tht's why she asked me, thinking I was Chinese. Lol. But after telling her that I was actually malay, she didn't mind much, cuz after all I looked like chinese, & spoke mandarin too, which was good enough.

Which reminds me, any of you wanna join me? Chinese only though, sry. Do contact me via email/phone.

Btw, I'm in Kuantan now, & my uncle has webcam! Woot! Lol. So if your free ppl, mari main webcam! Ngahaha. I'll be here till Thursday.


.Farah Alia.
Growing up, lost in her ups & downs, desperately trying to find the real meaning of life. With only 18 yrs of experience in life, its a journey. With memories that can nvr be forgotten.


Family. <33
The best family ever. To mummy & papa; Bringing me into this world, raising me up & protecting me, you're the only ones that I know who would never abandon me. You taught me the importance of loving a family, to take care of others, to value life & live as a good person. Even if once I didn't understand why & thought tht you were a nuisance to me, as I grow older I started to know why, & try my best to appreciate it. Of course, growing up, as Mummy puts it, I nvr know how high the sky is or how deep the ground is, in other words, I don't know my limits, but one thing's fer sure, I'll nvr forget how important family really is. Words of wisdom, I live to the fullest each day. I love you all.

Friends. <33
All sorts. Close, best, good, or just friends. All around, to laugh with, to share with, to be together with. Besties like Nad, supportive when they can be, there to cheer you up when you're down, we need people like that in our lives. I'm grateful to have friends like y'all, to share the fun I experience with. To just talk, or chill, or hangout. A part of your life that is always a must fer everyone. I love y'all. (:


Mell Joy Hilman
Liyana Sharia


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