.Tuesday, September 23, 2008 @ 1:54 PM Y
.silence.
Sooo.
Three more days of trials, Maths, Add Maths, Tk & Est, only to find out that a week after Raya there's Pra-SPM which will last fer three weeks, which leaves only 2 weeks till SPM,
the real dead thing.Gosh, Malaysian education is so full of shit wey! Gah, tension sial. Dahlah pape xigt lgsg, skrg trials pun cam sial je, ni dah nak SPM, lg 49 ari. Adoii.
Oh, & I found out yesterday that they have French in Spm. God, if I knew that two years ago I would soo have done that as an xtra sub wey! Gah gah gah.
=.=
Finally done with Raya shopping. Bought a purple kebaya, which, fyi, this yr's gonna be the first time in my life wearing kebaya fer Raya. Woot!
;D
.Sunday, September 21, 2008 @ 5:54 AM Y
.silence.
So.
Yet another drama-packed story in my life & what do you know, I seem to be moving backwards, to where everything started, or to be more exact, back to before I turned my life upside down by doing stuff that I shouldn't be doing. Back to old friends, old habits, a more
normal & innocent me, compared to what I became late last yr. Gah. Guess I should be happy with what I am now. Oh, wait,
I AM. & no one, no one can change that, not even those two faggots who I'm sure are
still talking about me as if I owe them the world, since I ended up with a terrible flu a few days back wtf.
Oh, mum want me to apply to UTAR next yr. Apparently a good place to study, under MCA, & with
high standards. Gah. Just what I needed. Extra hard work, Frh Alia.
xD
Last week's chem was like uber tough wey! Soalan2 yg kononnye bocor semue xkluar. Cam sial plak. Adoii. But n'way, it's over & done. Lmao.
.Wednesday, September 17, 2008 @ 6:13 AM Y
.silence.
To someone yang still xpuas ati ngan i:First off, I
don't make up stories about you to my friends. Think logically, I loved you, & if you were I, would you talk bad about person you loved? X kan? So,
you xyah nak tuduh I wat2 cite psl you. The only things I talk about is the truth about you, the things you did to me, & tu bkn namenye wat2 cite.
Oh, & you think you really know how I really am through
that woman? Hah, u knl sape lg lame, I ke die? Die pun, setakat setahun 'rapat' ngan I bajet dah knl I sgt2. Sry ar bai, Nad kawan baik I selama 6 tahun pun mengambil mase bbrp thun utk btol2 knl I.
& to
both of you, bulletin tuh, I yang suruh Nad wat? Come on la wey, I pun nak bce ape die tulis gak, I pun nak tau cite sebenarnye gak. Not putting the blame on her, but get your facts straight,
she told me via sms that she wanted to post a bulletin about all of us, & semue silap kitorg. I yg dipergunakan & dimain-mainkan perasaan xcomplain byk, yg korg dok xpuas ati asl? Jwbla, asl xpuas ati. Terang2 kat bulletin tuh sape yg silap, forward la kat org lain, tgk la dorg ckp ape. & I xgunekan die sbgai org tgh, dah mmg secara xlgsg die t'sekat kat tgh2, tuh bkan namenye org tgh.
& about your
gf; whoever who came with this statement tht I ni 'pemusnah hubungan org'; fyi, I didn't start all this, I xplan lgsg utk semue ni t'jd. I nak musnahkan hubungan org? nvr in million years would I want to. & fyi, I respect die sgt2. Bf ngan perangai cam you pun die ley syg lg, & sakit ati camne pun die xtrus sound org, die tanye baik2, ley siap b'kwn lg. Gf camtu you jaga la baik2, susah nak dpt org camtu skrg.
Igt I xtau ker, smpi ke saat ni korg ckp2 psl I? So what, stfuwy, idfc. I admit this, just because I talked bad about a best friend behind her back, look at what trouble I placed myself in. I should consider myself dead lucky to have a friend, a
best friend like Nad to be so patient with me. Now I'd wouldn't want to imagine what will happen to the both of you then. I xrugi pape, ape yg dah b'lalu I biarkannye b'lalu.
Igt2 la, sape yg nangis, yg risau gler2 mase u
'accident', sape yg cube menerima u sbgai kwn walaupun dah tau perangai u sebnr camne, & paling penting, igtla sape yg timbulkan segala masalah ni. Sry to say, but it was all
your fault, not mine. My only mistake was loving a person too much that I couldn't, that I didn't want to let go, & also trusting someone random way too easily. Jgn korg 2 nak meninggikan ego sgt, cam tupai je, pndi2 melompat akhirnya jatuh gak kat tanah tuh. Klu ade kesilapan diri sendiri tu, pndi2 la ngaku. Xnak ngaku kat org lain pun ngaku je la kat diri sendiri, lg2 nak dkat raya ni. Nak benci I ke ape, idc, janji, I dah bg advise, korg benci camne pown satu hari nnt korg akan fikir blk & rase ape yg I ckp betol.
I see now why both of you get along so easily. Personality, perangai dah nak dkat same, pttla korg ngam.
Ini bkan mengumpat, ni cume ape yg I nmpk. I don't see anything wrong with that, no one's perfect after all, we all have flaws, I have flaws.
To those who read this post & don't understand a word of what I'm saying (wtf), just keep in mind of these few things;
Don't hate. Hate is a strong word. Personally saying this, I don't hate. I may hate, but only for a short period of time. I usually forgive. But in this case, it may take awhile for me to heal & to forgive. Hating gets you nowhere, it's just the same as jealousy, which, unfortunately for me, got me caught up in my own emotional stress, just because of one word,
jealousy.
Next, why put the blame on others when you're at fault? How would you feel if someone did that to you? Accuse you of being wrong, when you're innocent, or knowing that the fault is yours, yet pushing it to another just to let the guilt melt away? Who wouldn't feel mad, frustrated. Apart from tht, it will all get back at you one day, with even worst consequences.
Lastly, since I forgot most of what I wanted to post (haha),
don't talk bad about others. One fact I've finally fully awaken myself with. N'way, it's human nature, who doesn't talk bad about each other, we all do it at least a few times in our lives. Yet we need to learn to refrain, as I have learnt, that due to bad-mouthing others I placed myself in a situation that I didn't want to be in. Oh, & about backstabbing, since
someone called me a backstabber; we've all backstab each other. Bad-mouthing? A form of backstabbing too. As there's a saying, best friends backstab you the most, so learn to accept tht fact, & don't accuse others, you'll end up accusing your ownself as well.
I learnt all this through the harsh way. I hurt myself physically & emotionally fer the past month & a half, just because of my own mistakes, my own weaknesses. & now, finally, everything's over. Fer me n'way. Idk about the others. This was one experience that I'd take to my grave, also one that helps me to grow even stronger, even more mature now. I guess I really believe now that
everything happens fer a reason.Don't ask me why I'm being a penceramah as early as 6am, this is the only way I can get others, & myself to wake up & think. Haha.
Good day everyone.
Love, frh alia. (:
